Mdm Chong C M, 70,

Married with no children
A bedridden stroke patient suffering from dementia

Bedridden but comforted by husband’s devotion

It is hard to know what goes on in Madam Chong’s mind as she lies awake, immobilized in an adjustable hospital bed, her eyes staring blankly at the closed window shutters.

Ask her how she is, and her imagination travels far and wide. In a thin wispy voice, she talks about her unfinished housework, her outings with her former colleagues, and her trips to the wet market. But her most vivid dream is about being able to walk again.

For one and a half years, the “beautiful and hardworking woman” whom her second husband, Mr Yee Boh Seng, 68, fondly remembers, has been confined to a bedridden life after a second stroke. The former cleaner who was fond of dancing, lost mobility of all her limbs, and became totally dependent on her husband for all her daily needs, including washing, toileting and feeding.

The childless couple were cleaners who met at the workplace. “She was very good at her work,” Mr Yee recalls, his tone softening and his thin leathery hands fiddling the only colour photograph he has of his wife in her younger days.

Neglect of a pre-existing high blood pressure condition was probably the cause of the stroke.

Struggling to make ends meet

When his wife became homebound, Mr Yee had to stop his temporary cleaning job to be a full time care giver. “I cannot afford to hire a maid to look after her,” he said. The couple survive on a monthly cash grant of $445 from Public Assistance (PA) which goes towards paying for the rental of a two-room HDB flat, electricity and water bills, meals and medicine.

Although Madam Chong qualifies for free medical treatment at the polyclinic as a PA recipient, she is unable to get to the polyclinic without an ambulance, and every round trip will cost about S$60, which the couple can ill afford.

Caregiver stress

Mr Yee is up by nine every morning to prepare breakfast and medication for his wife. He keeps his bedridden wife free from bedsores and her bedroom odour-free by changing her diapers three to five times a day, and giving her a sponge bath every morning. For meals, the devoted husband sometimes gives his wife bite sizes of her favourite noodles. “My wife loves noodles but she has difficulty swallowing. I will cut the noodles into small pieces, and feed her a little at a time.” Her hearty appetite and demands for food at odd hours keep him busy all day and night but he refuses to acknowledge that his wife could be showing signs of early dementia. Caring for a bedridden patient can lead to overwhelming stress. Mr Yee is so afraid to step out of the flat in case his wife calls for help. Being cooped up the whole day in a small flat has taken quite an emotional toil on him. “Sometimes, I need to take a short walk. Staying at home every day without a break is very tiring and boring.” Yet, Mr Yee continues to shoulder the strain and stress of care giving, and has never once thought of going against her wishes by sending her to a nursing home

A Lifeline from Hua Mei

After Madam Chong was referred to the Hua Mei Mobile Clinic, the clinic quickly assembled a home care team to visit her, and conduct a full assessment of all her needs.

Keeping Madam Chong’s medical condition stable was a top priority.

Mr Yee was taught basic caregiving skills such as turning the patient once every few hours to prevent pressure sores.

The Hua Mei social worker also found a sponsor to give Madam Chong a monthly free supply of adult diapers. Adult diapers, an essential item for bedridden patients, cost $120 a month (or S$1,800 a year) which is a strain on the couple’s subsistence budget.

To boost Madam Chong’s health, she receives free monthly medication and free supplementary milk feeds, at a total cost of S$200 a month (S$2,400 a year).

Caregiving has become less stressful for Mr Yee because he knows whom he can turn to for help in an emergency. “I know I can call the nurse, doctor or social worker at Hua Mei”, said Mr Yeo, heaving a sigh of relief.

Hua Mei’s Care Plan for Madam Chong Madam Chong has been a Hua Mei Mobile Clinic patient since June 2003. Her care plan included: • Regular monitoring of her medical condition through monthly nurse visits and quarterly doctor visits • Linking her to community services such as meals-on-wheels where food is delivered to the homes of the elderly at minimal cost, arranging subsidized transport to hospitals for specialist medical appointments • Free supply of adult diapers and supplementary milk feeds • Basic caregiver “training” to Mr Yee such as feeding, sponging, toileting, etc for bedbound patients

" My husband feeds and cleans me every day. I like my husband to care for me. I do not want to stay in a nursing home. The nurses scold and ignore me in the nursing home. I was crying all the time when I was staying there after my stroke. Staying at home is so much better. I am with my husband. I feel at peace. I wish I could get well soon so that I can walk to the market, talk to the neighbours and see my old friends,” said Madam Chong, in a faint voice.

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